My Husband Is My Best Friend – Hadiza el-Rufai

Hadiza el-Rufai is a symbol of genuine humility and a lady of few words. In her calm and quiet disposition, she has been working assiduously behind the scene, to support her husband who has a flair for politics. In this interview with Uche Uduma, the architect who recently rekindled her flair for writing opens up on her life and marriage with the former FCT minister, whom she describes as her best friend.


Who is Hadiza el-Rufai?

I’m just a normal Nigerian woman. I was born in Kano many years ago. I grew up between Kaduna and Kano. My parents moved to Kaduna when I was 11 years old. I went to Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria, where I studied architecture. I’m a wife and a mother. I have a small architectural firm.

You have a background in architecture, what stirred your interest in writing?

I have always had an interest in writing, but I never really had the time to fulfil that passion until 2008 when I decided to try out writing. I did some online courses, then I did MA in creative writing in Bath Spa University. I write, but you know, writing cannot pay your bills, so I still have to do other jobs.

Your husband describes you as his best friend, how would you describe him?

He is also my best friend too.

How did you two meet?

We met at the university; actually, we came to school of basic studies the same year. We were first friends with lots of people that came in the same year. From there, things went to another level.

Has he ever told you what attracted him to you?

(Laughs)… you will have to ask him that.

At some point in your marriage, your husband went on exile, how were you able to cope during the period?

It was a very difficult period for us, but with the help of my family and good friends, we were able to pull through. First, he was in the United States; he went to Harvard to have a programme, and I was also there. So, it wasn’t too bad. We thank God that everything is over.

How did you feel when your husband decided to go into politics?

I didn’t feel differently. You know, when your husband decides to do something, of course you will have to support him. I had to support.

2015 is around the corner, will you contest for any political position?

I will never want to go into politics. I’m not saying there is anything bad in politics, but it is important for everyone to know what suits them, in terms of personality. Politics is not for me, I don’t have that kind of personality. For you to be in politics, you need to be a people’s person. You should be able to be  comfortable where there is a lot of crowd and I don’t really like those kind of places.

Some of the policies your husband made when he was a minister were seen as anti-people, has it in any way affected your relationship with people?

I wouldn’t say that it has affected my relationship with other people because, I’m not a very outgoing person. I like to keep my privacy. So, I don’t think that has affected my relationship with people.  Although, when I go to some places, and I say my name is Hadiza el-Rufai, when they hear the surname, some have different emotions regarding that.  Apart from that, it has never affected my relationship with people.

Being your husband’s best friend, does your husband seek your opinion on government issues?

No, not at all. He doesn’t.

About your foundation, the Yasmin el-Rufai Creative Writing Workshop. What is it all about?

I lost my daughter about two years ago. So, we are trying to do something in her name, whereby we encourage young people who are into creative writing. So, we went into running workshop on a yearly basis for young people. We did the first one early this year, and we hope to do another one same time next year. It is just to encourage young people because creative writing is not something that is thought to be as important in our society and I believe we have a lot of talented people who need encouragement, and who may not have the opportunity to nurture their ability.

Which three words will you use to describe yourself?

Simple, private and fun-loving.

Where is your favourite overseas holiday destination?

Mauritius Island. It is a tiny island in the Indian Ocean, up the coast after Madagascar from South Africa. It’s very quiet and scenic.

What do you do in your spare time?

I stay with my family. I write, I read and I golf.

So who is your favourite author?

I don’t have a favorite author. I read everything that is interesting. But lately, I have read a lot of Nigerian authors. I think there are very good writers in Nigeria and I must say that my favourite author is Chimamanda Adichie.

What fashion accessory appeals to you most?

I love watches.

What can you not be seen wearing?

I don’t wear short things at all. I don’t feel comfortable when my legs are showing. So, I usually wear trousers or long skirts. So, I can never be caught wearing a short skirt.

What advice do you have for young people who  would want to follow your footsteps?

Be true to yourself. Don’t just do things because other people are doing it. Be yourself, regardless of what other people are doing or saying.